Have your pants ever shrunk?
Mine have.
And since the first digit of my age became a four, it seems to happen more often.
I know, I know – these things just happen as we age, and with my 44th around the corner, it made sense and felt like permission to get new pants (fun!) and buy a size up. But then that pesky inner voice started up, like she always does, and ruined all the fun.
“You work out,” she said. “You eat right. You sleep so much you’re totally boring. You get your sunshine and water and you bought a red light for crying out loud! You should be the picture of health!”
It’s true! I do all the right things! So why do my pants keep shrinking?
Instead of answering that question, I just resigned to it happening. Nothing wrong with bigger pants, right? Plus, there was nothing more I could do. I was putting in my maximum effort to stay healthy, and I guess it just stopped working.
Thus is life. Relax.
Confession: I’m not the relaxing type.
I’ve grown a lot (and not just in the pants) over the past few years. There was a part of me that only a few years ago would have accepted that I just had to drop it and move on – but I realize now, that part of me is gone.
I did a thorough examination of my motives.
I wasn’t hung up on being thin.
I wasn’t worried about being judged.
I was worried I was missing something.
When I really need an answer, the first place I look is UP.
It’s a habit I’ve been practicing since I was a little kid. When I’m really stuck, I ask God for help. And no, I didn’t pray that my waist would shrink. Instead I prayed for clarity and to reveal what I may be missing. I said, “Lord, I’m doing all the ‘right’ things, why doesn’t it show up in my body?”
He answered me through Instagram.
It’s a habit I’ve been practicing since I was a little kid. When I’m really stuck, I ask God for help. And no, I didn’t pray that my waist would shrink. Instead I prayed for clarity and to reveal what I may be missing. I said, “Lord, I’m doing all the ‘right’ things, why doesn’t it show up in my body?”
He answered me through Instagram.
I’m a stories kind of girl.
No offence to anyone reading this, but I barely see any of your posts. I stick almost exclusively to the stories – it’s just the way I am.
So, as per my nightly custom I was scrolling through stories, and noticed this nutritionist I followed. I’m not sure how or why I started following her, but I found myself really drawn to her stories. There were always many – like so many it looked like a string of dots along the top of the screen – which is usually a turn off for me, but this was different. There was so much content because she was so passionate about what she was doing – she needed to talk about it.
A lot.
She would excitedly nerd out at length over a study she’d just read, a workshop she took, or a connection she’d just made, and the joy and passion on her face and in her voice was just so … so …
Compelling.
Her passion drew me in.
We agreed on almost everything. She had all the science behind it, but it was what I was doing more or less. And she dropped really helpful ideas in there too, like adrenal cocktails and the like, that I also found very useful.
In short, from a practical standpoint, I felt like she didn’t have much to offer me outside of affirming what I already knew.
So on this particular night, scrolling along, she mentioned how to work with her and posted a link to book a discovery call, and I honestly don’t know what compelled me to do it but I booked an appointment with her.
I had no idea what I was doing.
As I waited for her to start our Zoom meeting, I was struck with worry that I would have nothing more to say than “I agree with you” as I wasted her time. But as soon as we started talking, I could see this was about far more than what you eat, which exercise you do, or how many hours you sleep.
This was about the utterly lost notion of nourishment.
Nourishing each and every cell in the body. Giving it what it needs to thrive, avoiding the things that harm it, and trusting that in that state, your body will just thrive. She assured me that when the “symphony of the body is in harmony,” health will arise. And it doesn’t matter how it looks, you’ll know it when it’s here.
I hired her on the spot.
Then I had huge buyer’s remorse – nutritionists are expensive. I had to take a test timed with ovulation before we could get started, so there was a delay in our start date – a delay that left lots of room for doubt.
In that time she gave me a meal plan that was very helpful and would ensure that my cells got the goods. I instantly started feeling more energy and clarity, but the biggest thing I noticed was: I felt like I was eating all of the time.
I was eating every three hours. And not little things like an apple or handful of nuts. We’re talking a protein/carb/fat every 3 hours. And BREAKFAST! I’d been intermittent fasting for about 3 years and skipping breakfast every day.
My body was so grateful and I could feel it in my soul, but the pants got tighter and my faith got shakier. As my understanding of nourishment began to change through this experience, I had a terrible realization.
I had been starving my body my whole life.
Not in the way where I was hungry 24/7. But in that I looked at myself as a beast to be tamed, instead of a beautiful human being who needed to be nourished.
What a frigging shame.
My test results came back.
I met with her to discuss my test result and we were both excited. As we worked through it, I saw that I was eating the right things, and doing the right exercises, but all of my efforts were muted by my body’s ability to reap the benefits.
Muted by stress.
I could see on the paper in front of me, the effect that prolonged stress was having on my life. And if left unchecked, where it could go.
I could see clearly how to fix it. And not for the love of smaller pants – it was for love of myself, my health and the example I am setting for my children.
That phone call empowered me to really assess what is important in my life and truly grasp its effect on my most precious resource:
Me.
But something even more amazing happened on that call.
As she watched all of these barriers bursting in my head, around what it means to nourish ourselves, she paused. She got choked up. She excused herself for tearing up. And she said,
“We’re creating a new world for our daughters.
A new way for them to view themselves, the role of food, and a new way to sit down at a dinner table.”
AND THAT RIGHT THERE, was the lesson I came for.
And the one she was made to deliver.
Question: Why doesn’t my body behave?
Answer: You’re living in a flawed reality. Your body needs to be loved and treated like the gift it is. And you need to drop your attachment to the outcome. And most importantly, you need to bring this knowledge to your daughters.
YOU: Alright Lora, that’s great. But why is this in a business email?
Believe it or not, none of this is to convince you of how to view or treat your body.
This is a story about the importance of passion.
I needed to see Nadine’s passion around nourishing women to call me in. I honestly didn’t think she had anything to offer me – we already agreed on everything. But she had an ingredient that I truly needed: I needed to piggyback off her passion.
This is why it is CRITICAL that YOU follow YOUR passion.
It sounds insane to say that I am passionate about making great websites. But you know what? I frigging AM! I love it. I love what it does for my clients – it gives them confidence, a centralized message, a place to send people, an intense inventory of what make them so great, plus websites are really cool and I get to be creative all day long – it’s endless really.
And people come to ME to piggyback off MY passion, because they’re not passionate about making websites, even though they need one.
No rush, but we’re all waiting for you.
You were given your passion for a reason. And living it may feel like you’re talking endlessly into the one-way vortex that is Instagram and dropping a million stories about it to no one at all.
But you’re not.
You’re opening a space in the ether, and filling it with an excitement, reverence and interest about your particular passion, in a way that only you can, and leaving it open to be stumbled upon.
And when there is a woman in tight pants out there, scrolling for an answer, you owe it to yourself to have laid the foundation for her to step right into that space, and be guided back home by you.
Because that’s what you do – nothing more.
And certainly nothing less.
It’s not just something you love. And it’s not just something you’re good at.
It’s your calling.
And we need you to create that space in the ether for us.
If you’re sitting on a dream, please … get doing it.
Call me if you need a hand.
XO
Lora
